I find solace in writing. Thanks to several newly planted seeds germinating in my life bed, I barely find time to compose anything anymore – even short, sweet little blogposts. With my new job, which I love, I barely find time to embrace what came so naturally to me: exercising daily, partying downtown with friends, cooking meals from scratch and more. I barely have time to glance at my phone and answer texts as promptly as before. Headaches come and go, thanks to Advil and coffee.
I do find myself fashioning new, dressy outfits and changing my appearance to please the crowds, though. Painting smiles on my face disguises my somewhat exhausted state. Countless questions roam in my head as I try to advance myself and grow as a person…should I pursue my career, or friendships? What about love? What about my living situation? Should I stay where I am, or travel down some new corridor?
A headache rages now as I write, and despite the nuances confronting me seemingly everywhere I go, I thank the heavens for comfortable yet stylish clothes and shoes. With a naked face and flat, lackluster hair, I need not hide my disappointment from people once so familiar to me – now seemingly unfamiliar, I cannot decipher who has truly changed. Them, or me? Will roses sprout from these changes, or weeds? If roses, will insects and disease overtake them? How brilliant will their red shades shine? Only time will tell.
With daunting developments throughout the world biting away at our minds and hearts, from court rulings, jury decisions, and more, my personal “perils” decrease in significance. Let us focus on embracing change for the better, and note that everything, no matter how questionable, happens for some reason for the betterment of society. The work simply lays in discovering that reason – and embracing it.
‘Til next time, my friends.
One thought on “Painted Smiles and Roses”
I’ve noticed you haven’t been popping up on my Bloglovin’ and I’m glad to see you’re still around but I send my good wishes as you navigate this very confusing part of your life. You’re still in school, right? If so, what I can tell you is that life does get “easier” afterward, especially if you are driven. I worked very hard in school, and now I have a 830-5 and I get to come home and write. I write and post and “social media” until 10pm, but it feels so good. I’m sure you’ll get to another time in your life when you have the opportunity to get back to the things you love :)